Dancing to the rhythm of maturity
I have never considered myself to be one who possessed great dancing ability, let alone having a strength to rhythm. Yet, I have often admired how others are able to allow themselves to be led by their dancing partners. There is nothing like following the lead of a confident dancing partner and being transported surefooted across a dance floor. Furthermore, it is one thing being on the dance floor yourself, but there is also the dimension of how dance is appreciated from the perspective of an observer. The observer often might not possess the ability to dance, but just observing others skillfully gliding across the dance floor has the potential to inspire. It is as if the observer can imagine him/herself in the shoes of the dancer being transported across the floor.
Dancing to the rhythm of maturity means being perfectly present in the company of adversity, yet not yielding to the unsteady hand of emotionalism. Maturity dictates that we have mastered the ability to control our emotions in order to avoid the temptation to meander into the labyrinth of another’s insecurity. There are moments when one must forgo the temporal opportunity to win an argument in order to safe oneself from a season of regret. At the heart of maturity lies the ability to discern how to use the medium of words to articulate heartfelt or passionate expressions in a manner which is neither demeaning, nor creates the impression that one is superior to others.
Dancing is essentially about movement and one’s ability to be flexible. Maturity demands that one be flexible enough, although grounded in one’s belief, to appreciate someone else’s ability to hold a different perspective. In addition, maturity aides one to not become stuck in the quagmire of ignorance and to show progression in one’s understanding of the meaning of life. One cannot merely dance to the tune of a distorted understanding and expect those who dance together with you to simply embrace your dissonance. Thus, some have become tone deaf to the heartfelt expressions of others, because they insist on making moves which are out of step with reality.
The more I learn to appropriate maturity in my life, the more I realise that dancing to the rhythm of maturity is not about how well I lead others whose feet are out of step. It means very little if I have no appreciation for where others are in their journey of development. It is not about enforcing my understanding or views onto them, but the answer is lodged in my ability to respond sensitively to where they are. I can only lead them if I show understanding of that which hinders their progress or diminishes their ability to comprehend the need for change. Maturity does not mean that I have bought the rights to the dance floor, but that I have learned to appropriate my position in relation to others. Quite frankly, maturity does not even mean that I have progressed to the level of adjudicator or judge standing on the margins of the dance floor rating the movement of others. For my place cannot be devoid of the presence of the engagement with others.
For as long as there is life the music is continuously playing. Maturity means that we have danced to the tune of life long enough, but we have expanded our ability to dance to a different rhythm. The dancing partners constantly change, and we may be tempted to take a break from dancing. What is however clear- even in moments when we are resting, the movement and the refrain of the music continues long after we have left the room.
